Prior to my having radiotherapy in December 2002 I was experiencing extreme pain, fatigue and nausea. After being awake from 4.30am with a blinding headache I wrote the following about God’s ‘light’ that was keeping me going.
Life is good
“Life is good
And life is going to continue to bring goodness
There is beauty now
And I know there is more beauty to come
Things can be, and are, painful
But all things have beauty
As with the stars on a cloudy night
You continue to shine
Behind the thick clouds
Of illness and pain
Your light will still keep me strong
And it is that strength that this light gives me
That will shine out and show God’s hand in all of this.
There is beauty in the dark hours
For it is at those times
That I can dream about
And anticipate the sun
That will shine over my life”
It is amazing for me to read this piece of writing eleven years on from having had radiotherapy, no longer having a brain tumour. Knowing that what I had to go through with the radiotherapy was all worth it.
I still have to endure living with continual pain and intense headaches. However, what amazes me is that it is this same light that leads me on, this same light that brings beauty into my dark times, and this same light that continues to give me strength every day.
It is also so incredible for me to be able to read this now, at a time in my life when I am seeing many of my dreams come true.
I believe that having had great expectations about what God has had in store for me, based on scripture, has had a huge impact on my life over these past 14 years. This belief kept alive in me great hope for my future during times when I couldn’t even think beyond the next hour. Somehow maintaining this hope that good things were to come during the incredibly difficult years between 2000 and 2010 has led to my now seeing some of those dreams come true.
God is good, life is good, and God has great plans for us all when we put our trust in Him.